i’m leaving the hospital today and heading back home to maine to recover. it’s certainly been a rough whirlwind of a few days. we came down to boston and stayed in the hotel next to the hospital wednesday. bright and early thursday morning we went into surgical admitting and they whisked me away. went into [...]
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well i’m in boston having my 5th and second to last chemo (YAY!!). i just got my iv in and my first drug started and i thought about what i just heard in my visit with the doctor and just giggled from happiness. i came down on friday to have a PET and CT scan [...]
i realized i’m dreaming like i’ll live forever, but i’m not living like i’ll die tomorrow. and that pisses me off.
breast cancer at age 32. how the hell does that happen? i thought the light was dim when i saw the black cloud but i had no idea. i see it there tho. it’s still shining and i know it’ll be bright again. it’s just waiting in the dark. with that sting in your eyes. [...]
i feel as tho my life is surrounded with big looming black clouds and every day is a fight to keep them away. name every person in my family and i can tell you a sad story. me included. ella not included, thankfully.
if i thought it might matter, i’d say if i thought saying it again would work, i would but nothing manages to mean anything when you look at it i pretty much feel lost to it all so i sit quietly wondering where to go from here
we went out in the cold and wind to get a christmas tree this morning and it was so much fun. i love this time of year. i’ve managed to find time to decorate a little while ella cat naps throughout the day. i’ve enjoyed my 8 weeks at home so much. the thought of [...]
ella will be 6 weeks on monday! i can’t believe it. she’s a little piglet, she already weighs 10 lbs. i have to go back to work in 2 weeks. ugh. gross.